In-Cart Hands-Free Message Arrow Device

I must say it’s been very quiet at the castle these last few days. There isn’t a lot to report but the Prince has been almost pleasant so something dastardly must be on the horizon!

I have received further confirmation from my sources that the “The Artists and The Carts” posting appears to be basically true. Now that we have a crack in the formidable wall of red tape previously erected by the Kingdom’s Keeper of the Carts & Carriages let’s hope it widens somewhat and leads to improvements in all the wheeled machines across the Kingdom.

What say you to that dear King? If you do decree it so... then please…not just for the nobles again…think of your serfs and peasants I beg you. Perhaps an in-cart mandolin, oak wheels and real horsehair seats covers are small additions to you…but to us it would be sheer luxury!

I sometimes think that a in-cart hands-free message arrow device (ICHFMAD) would be nice….but…. even if I have a ICHFMAD fitted the King’s regulations say I can only use it when I am not in motion? But, if I am not in motion then I do not need a ICHFMAD…… as I can perfectly well draw the bow myself?

Is this not a puzzle indeed because logically one must ask the question… why does anyone need an ICHFMAD if they cannot use it without fear of the stocks? Surely there are considerable savings to be made across the Kingdom by not buying any more and thereby reducing all the MAD enabled freemen and nobles.

But I am not a Chancellor, I am only a lowly serf. So what do I know?

The Artists And The Carts

Has it been four years already? My horse and cart is up for renewal. It looks like I can have the same choice of horse and cart as I did before. I can have a choice of colour (black, grey, pinto, piebald) so that’s fine except………

Word has reached the castle that in another part of the realm far far away from our blighted land, the artists (a disreputable bunch in any castle - but fellow serfs none the less) are to have bigger carts and bigger horses. The artists have been saying that their easels have got bigger, their paint brushes longer, their palettes more numerous and that they need bigger carts to take the load.

The artists are sending out arrows to all parts of the kingdom with the message that their Prince is bountiful and loved by all….one might say that they are extracting the urine from their fellow serfs in other Princedoms…..boasting of their success and making merry at the expense of other artists who cannot have a bigger horse and cart due to their own Prince’s reduction in the feed and tack budget!

If one Princedom needs bigger carts for its artists should not all other artists in the kingdom be getting bigger carts, even if they sometimes have to share them? Are not their easels, paint brushes and palettes of equal size?

And….now that I come to think about it…within the last four years my quills have grown, I now carry a writing case and the legal books I need to avoid committing anything to paper of a libellous nature are numerous. It’s as good a case as the artists put forward so should I not also be given a bigger horse and cart??

Perhaps I should petition the King?

Back From The Crusades!

Would all serfs and interested nobles please forgive the delay since I last posted. I have been to the crusades on my hols and have now returned with sunburn and some very pretty souvenir Saracen heads.

As seems to be the way of this blog my post-box is full but the comments are scarce. So be it, my (slightly chicken hearted) fellow serfs and peasants.

Many of the mails I have received seem to follow the theme put forward by “Anonymous” in the comments section of my previous post. That is - have I got it wrong and was I originally right!!

Is the true power behind the throne not the King but actually the Prince? If this is so, what reason can there be for such a reversal of roles? Is the Prince a master of the dark arts? Does he conjure up spirits and devils to bend the King’s will? I must admit it is a possibility and would go some way to explaining the strange happenings at the castle and at the palace.

I will keep my ear to the ground for further information and I ask you to do the same. I ask the growing band of merrie men and women to please continue emailing - and to the brave ones - try commenting direct. It’s not as painful as it might appear.

PS

A late arrow has arrived with a message that the Prince may be in possession of WMDs (Words of Much Disorder) that could be deployed within 45 minutes.

Now where have I heard that before………...??